In my first blogpost, I mentioned the reasons for my interest in studying effective communication. The 3 reasons I stated are:
1) Effective communication is vital in building good relationships.
2) Effective communication is vital in maintaining the relationships that were built.
3) Effective communication is a vital skill in the working society.
Through the 12 weeks of this course, my increased knowledge regarding effective communication has further enhanced my beliefs in the reasons for the need to communicate effectively.
However, prior to this course, I have always thought of communication as the sound that escapes from our mouths. In my narrow-minded views, I had always had the belief that “one whom can speak well will go far in life”. This course, however, had succeeded in broadening my views and teaching me otherwise. Yes, “Sounds that escapes from our mouths” indeed plays a major part in effective communication. However, I have learnt that many other aspects such as active listening and non-verbal cues are just as important.
I feel that one of the many aspects I have enjoyed in this course is the opportunity to interact with the fellow members of the class. It provided us with an opportunity to actively apply what we had learnt from the course. Knowing the theory alone will not make a person a better communicator if he cannot put it into practice. Through the various discussion sections, mock interviews and peer reviews, I have had the opportunity to apply what I learnt, with the additional bonus of getting to know new friends.
In conclusion, I belief that the knowledge and skills that I have obtained from this module will be important in the future. However, effective communication is not a skill which we can master in just a period of 12 weeks. As such, it is important for us to continue learning and improving on the skills that we had been taught.
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Monday, March 23, 2009
Biodata
Hong Quan is a year 3 chemistry undergraduate at the National University of Singapore. Prior to pursuing his bachelor degree, he was a reconnaissance specialist in an infantry brigade where he displayed leadership abilities in leading a four man team in various exercises.
Being a firm believer in the need for constant learning, Hong Quan is always on a look out for new skills with which he can improve himself. He is currently picking up a new language and am looking to further his studies upon graduation.
Hong Quan’s interests lies with the environment. He is a mountaineering enthusiast and has recently climbed South-East Asia’s highest peak, Mount Kinabalu. As such, he hopes that his knowledge in Chemistry can be used in the protection of the environment and hopes to pursue a career in Environmental Chemistry or Green Chemistry.
Being a firm believer in the need for constant learning, Hong Quan is always on a look out for new skills with which he can improve himself. He is currently picking up a new language and am looking to further his studies upon graduation.
Hong Quan’s interests lies with the environment. He is a mountaineering enthusiast and has recently climbed South-East Asia’s highest peak, Mount Kinabalu. As such, he hopes that his knowledge in Chemistry can be used in the protection of the environment and hopes to pursue a career in Environmental Chemistry or Green Chemistry.
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Butter Knife or Dinner knife?
A while back when I was still a year one “freshie”, a lecturer of mine, who owns a company, commented that he chooses most of his senior management team by bringing them to dinner. During dinner, he would observe the dining habits of the candidates, read their non-verbal cues and be able to determine the characters of the candidates.
At about the same time, a friend of mine, who was in NTU, got selected to be interviewed for a potentially good-paying job with J.P.Morgan. As part of the selection process involved having dinner with members of the senior management team of J.P.Morgan, my friend was made to take up a course about proper dining etiquette.
These two instances demonstrated the importance of possessing proper dining etiquette. I feel that your dining habits are subtle, non-verbal communication tools that allow people to get an in sight into your character.
Can you imagine a scenario where while having dinner with your boss, or a client, you picked up a butter knife and proceeded to attempt to cut a piece of beef with it? What message do you think your dining partner will interpret from this non-verbal cue?
In truth, in Singapore, we are seldom needed to differentiate the different knives, forks and spoons placed on the table. But other dining etiquette such as table manners still applies.
At about the same time, a friend of mine, who was in NTU, got selected to be interviewed for a potentially good-paying job with J.P.Morgan. As part of the selection process involved having dinner with members of the senior management team of J.P.Morgan, my friend was made to take up a course about proper dining etiquette.
These two instances demonstrated the importance of possessing proper dining etiquette. I feel that your dining habits are subtle, non-verbal communication tools that allow people to get an in sight into your character.
Can you imagine a scenario where while having dinner with your boss, or a client, you picked up a butter knife and proceeded to attempt to cut a piece of beef with it? What message do you think your dining partner will interpret from this non-verbal cue?
In truth, in Singapore, we are seldom needed to differentiate the different knives, forks and spoons placed on the table. But other dining etiquette such as table manners still applies.
Friday, February 27, 2009
Evaluating Intercultural Behavior
Globalization has led to an increasingly borderless world. As such, the need to be sensitive to the difference in cultures between people of different nationalities is greater than ever before. Insensitivity to such cultural differences can lead to interpersonal conflicts (on a personal level) and loss of businesses (on a business level).
However, I feel that before we concern ourselves with the need to be sensitive to the cultural differences of people from other countries, it is more important that, as Singaporeans, we are sensitive to the differences in cultures of the different race and religion in Singapore.
I came across this situation during the Chinese Hungry Ghost Festival last year. During this festival, it is common for some religion groups to burn incense and joss paper as offerings to the spirits that are thought to be released to “our world”. I was walking pass a lady who was burning incense and joss paper when a well-dressed woman, who was with her son, approached in the opposite direction. As they neared the area where the incense was being burned, the woman suddenly reached down to her son and covered his nose with her hand. In a rather unpleasant tone, she said: “Why do they have to burn such ridiculous things!”
Luckily, the lady burning the incense did not see or hear the woman, thus, a potential conflict did not occur.
In Singapore, the key to maintaining harmony among a multi-racial and multi-religion society is to be sensitive to the cultural differences of the different race and religions. Therefore, this need is taught to us early in our educational years. As such, we are generally quite sensitive to the practices of members of a different race or religion. However, I feel that the increase in affluence may have caused some of this “sensitivity” to be eroded. As such, I feel that we should start to be more concerned about our attitudes to the differences in cultures of the different race and religion in Singapore.
However, I feel that before we concern ourselves with the need to be sensitive to the cultural differences of people from other countries, it is more important that, as Singaporeans, we are sensitive to the differences in cultures of the different race and religion in Singapore.
I came across this situation during the Chinese Hungry Ghost Festival last year. During this festival, it is common for some religion groups to burn incense and joss paper as offerings to the spirits that are thought to be released to “our world”. I was walking pass a lady who was burning incense and joss paper when a well-dressed woman, who was with her son, approached in the opposite direction. As they neared the area where the incense was being burned, the woman suddenly reached down to her son and covered his nose with her hand. In a rather unpleasant tone, she said: “Why do they have to burn such ridiculous things!”
Luckily, the lady burning the incense did not see or hear the woman, thus, a potential conflict did not occur.
In Singapore, the key to maintaining harmony among a multi-racial and multi-religion society is to be sensitive to the cultural differences of the different race and religions. Therefore, this need is taught to us early in our educational years. As such, we are generally quite sensitive to the practices of members of a different race or religion. However, I feel that the increase in affluence may have caused some of this “sensitivity” to be eroded. As such, I feel that we should start to be more concerned about our attitudes to the differences in cultures of the different race and religion in Singapore.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Business Correspondence Critique
“Hello
Greetings from Sabah Holidays!
Hope this email fine you well. Hi, my name is Ms XXX, I believe that you have met up with our Sales Representative during the Fascinating Malaysia 2008 Fair in Singapore recently.
Have you fix your date for Mt Climbing in Sabah yet? Can you enlighten me when is the date you would like to climb the mount Kinabalu, so that we can check the availibility of the lodge.
2. How many climbers?
3. How many days would you like to stay in KK?
Looking forward to hear from you soonest.
Kind regards
MS XXXCustomer Service Executive(Their Company name and Address) (Their Contact Details)”
I received this e-mail last year in December when I was looking for tour packages to trek up Mount Kinabalu with my friends. In general, I feel that this mail has fulfilled some of the 7Cs in writing. Firstly, the mail was written in a courteous tone, it adopts a you-attitude, focusing mainly on the recipient of the e-mail. For example, the sentence: “Can you enlighten me when is the date you would like to climb the mount Kinabalu.” could have easily been written as: “I need to know the dates which you would like to climb mount Kinabalu.” which would have sounded less courteous. Secondly, the e-mail is concise as it avoids the use of redundant words and expressions.
However, there are also parts of the 7Cs which the e-mail did not fulfill. Firstly, the mail had several grammatical errors. For example, the sentence: “Looking forward to hear from you soonest.” should have been written as: “Looking forward to hear from you soon.” This goes against “correctness” of the 7Cs. Secondly, I feel that the e-mail is lacking in cohesion. The sudden jump from “….Fair in Singapore recently.” to “Have you fix your date…….” could have been better linked together by a sentence such as: “There are several information that we would need you to provide. Firstly, have you fixed….”
I feel that there are several other improvements that can be made with this e-mail. As it is a supposed to be a formal letter, the use of “Dear Mr YYY” would be better than just a plain “Hello” Furthermore, I feel that the sender should also have included the location and date of the fair that I met the sales representative. It is quite possible that I had been looking around at other tour agencies and at other fairs and I will not be able to remember which fair and which sales representative the sender has mentioned.
On the other hand, I feel that the signing off is appropriate in the context of a business correspondence. By including the company’s address and contact details, I was reassured that it is from a legitimate company and that the mail isn’t some “spam-mail”.
Greetings from Sabah Holidays!
Hope this email fine you well. Hi, my name is Ms XXX, I believe that you have met up with our Sales Representative during the Fascinating Malaysia 2008 Fair in Singapore recently.
Have you fix your date for Mt Climbing in Sabah yet? Can you enlighten me when is the date you would like to climb the mount Kinabalu, so that we can check the availibility of the lodge.
2. How many climbers?
3. How many days would you like to stay in KK?
Looking forward to hear from you soonest.
Kind regards
MS XXXCustomer Service Executive(Their Company name and Address) (Their Contact Details)”
I received this e-mail last year in December when I was looking for tour packages to trek up Mount Kinabalu with my friends. In general, I feel that this mail has fulfilled some of the 7Cs in writing. Firstly, the mail was written in a courteous tone, it adopts a you-attitude, focusing mainly on the recipient of the e-mail. For example, the sentence: “Can you enlighten me when is the date you would like to climb the mount Kinabalu.” could have easily been written as: “I need to know the dates which you would like to climb mount Kinabalu.” which would have sounded less courteous. Secondly, the e-mail is concise as it avoids the use of redundant words and expressions.
However, there are also parts of the 7Cs which the e-mail did not fulfill. Firstly, the mail had several grammatical errors. For example, the sentence: “Looking forward to hear from you soonest.” should have been written as: “Looking forward to hear from you soon.” This goes against “correctness” of the 7Cs. Secondly, I feel that the e-mail is lacking in cohesion. The sudden jump from “….Fair in Singapore recently.” to “Have you fix your date…….” could have been better linked together by a sentence such as: “There are several information that we would need you to provide. Firstly, have you fixed….”
I feel that there are several other improvements that can be made with this e-mail. As it is a supposed to be a formal letter, the use of “Dear Mr YYY” would be better than just a plain “Hello” Furthermore, I feel that the sender should also have included the location and date of the fair that I met the sales representative. It is quite possible that I had been looking around at other tour agencies and at other fairs and I will not be able to remember which fair and which sales representative the sender has mentioned.
On the other hand, I feel that the signing off is appropriate in the context of a business correspondence. By including the company’s address and contact details, I was reassured that it is from a legitimate company and that the mail isn’t some “spam-mail”.
Sunday, February 1, 2009
Resolving Interpersonal Conflict
Every family has its fair share of conflicts among its respective family members and my family isn’t any exception. Occasionally, my mum, tired after a day’s work, returns home and feels that the house is in an unsatisfactory state. Deeming either one or all of her three sons to have failed in fulfilling our job in helping out, she would tend to vent her frustrations at us. Usually, we would choose to just let her words fly by us.
Not too long ago, I returned home to find that the clothes that were hung outside had not been brought in. The clothes were drenched in rainwater. As I was the only one at home at that time, I brought the clothes in before continuing on with my own activities. Not long after, my mum came home from work. Seeing the wet clothes and she flew into a rage and started to scold me for not bringing it in when it rained. Being an innocent party, I quickly defended myself by saying that the clothes were already wet when I came home. Unfortunately, it did not seem to work and the scolding continued. Out of pure frustration, I shouted back that it wasn’t my fault. The scolding stopped and silence broke out.
My mum and I did not speak to each other for two days after that. Curiously, the event seemed to have been forgotten after that and things went back to normal.
Thinking back to the event, I admit that I could have handled the situation in a better manner. It was obvious that at that point of time, my mum was tired from work and totally disappointed that her workload was increased by the drenched clothes. As such, her emotions probably got the better of her and resulted in her “losing it”. On the other hand, I was also tired from school and got irritated that I was interrupted from resting and even accused of something which wasn’t my fault.
It isn’t easy bringing up children and I love my mum for the fact that she is so successful in bringing up me and my brothers. It was the first and only time I ever shouted at my mum and it left me feeling awful after it had happened. How could I have handled the situation in a better way? Would exercising better EQ and placing myself in my mum’s shoes lead to a better solution to the conflict?
In my opinion, interpersonal conflicts tends to occur more often with people you are close with (due to the larger amount of time spent together). When it occurs, it never fails to erode the strength of your relationship with the other party. Hence, it is important that we learn how to react and manage our emotions to prevent such conflicts from occurring.
Not too long ago, I returned home to find that the clothes that were hung outside had not been brought in. The clothes were drenched in rainwater. As I was the only one at home at that time, I brought the clothes in before continuing on with my own activities. Not long after, my mum came home from work. Seeing the wet clothes and she flew into a rage and started to scold me for not bringing it in when it rained. Being an innocent party, I quickly defended myself by saying that the clothes were already wet when I came home. Unfortunately, it did not seem to work and the scolding continued. Out of pure frustration, I shouted back that it wasn’t my fault. The scolding stopped and silence broke out.
My mum and I did not speak to each other for two days after that. Curiously, the event seemed to have been forgotten after that and things went back to normal.
Thinking back to the event, I admit that I could have handled the situation in a better manner. It was obvious that at that point of time, my mum was tired from work and totally disappointed that her workload was increased by the drenched clothes. As such, her emotions probably got the better of her and resulted in her “losing it”. On the other hand, I was also tired from school and got irritated that I was interrupted from resting and even accused of something which wasn’t my fault.
It isn’t easy bringing up children and I love my mum for the fact that she is so successful in bringing up me and my brothers. It was the first and only time I ever shouted at my mum and it left me feeling awful after it had happened. How could I have handled the situation in a better way? Would exercising better EQ and placing myself in my mum’s shoes lead to a better solution to the conflict?
In my opinion, interpersonal conflicts tends to occur more often with people you are close with (due to the larger amount of time spent together). When it occurs, it never fails to erode the strength of your relationship with the other party. Hence, it is important that we learn how to react and manage our emotions to prevent such conflicts from occurring.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Effective Communication Skills
Why Effective Communication?
1) It is vital in building good relationships.
Communication is an essential part of our everyday life. Whenever we meet someone on the streets, subtle and obvious body languages, such as the movement of your eyes and the words uttered out from your mouth, are part of communication signals received and interpreted by the other party. Human relationships, in fact, are very commonly built on the communication signals received by the various parties. Admittedly, much of my impressions of people are based on the first few communication signals I receive from them. Hence, effective communication is the foundation of relationship building skills.
2) It maintains the relationships built.
In my view, it is harder to maintain a relationship than to start one. The constant interaction between people creates plenty a chance for friction and unhappiness to occur. These frictions, I feel, are often created due to nothing more than just miscommunications or misunderstandings. Hence, effective communication skills prevent such misunderstandings from occurring.
3) It is a vital skill required in the working society.
Knowing how to communicate to superiors, subordinates and colleagues is important in one’s career advancements. Such is the reality of the working society that one who enjoys good relationships throughout would tend to succeed more than another whose relationships with people are questionable. Secondly, effective communication skills among team members are important in ensuring that the team can work effectively as a team.
1) It is vital in building good relationships.
Communication is an essential part of our everyday life. Whenever we meet someone on the streets, subtle and obvious body languages, such as the movement of your eyes and the words uttered out from your mouth, are part of communication signals received and interpreted by the other party. Human relationships, in fact, are very commonly built on the communication signals received by the various parties. Admittedly, much of my impressions of people are based on the first few communication signals I receive from them. Hence, effective communication is the foundation of relationship building skills.
2) It maintains the relationships built.
In my view, it is harder to maintain a relationship than to start one. The constant interaction between people creates plenty a chance for friction and unhappiness to occur. These frictions, I feel, are often created due to nothing more than just miscommunications or misunderstandings. Hence, effective communication skills prevent such misunderstandings from occurring.
3) It is a vital skill required in the working society.
Knowing how to communicate to superiors, subordinates and colleagues is important in one’s career advancements. Such is the reality of the working society that one who enjoys good relationships throughout would tend to succeed more than another whose relationships with people are questionable. Secondly, effective communication skills among team members are important in ensuring that the team can work effectively as a team.
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